
Yes a parents free zone "even I am not
allowed in except to update the content says Dr Vip".
Here is a list of what is on this page
(click on the words to the links):







I aim to have the best collection of doctor doctor jokes known
in the whole universe so if there are some that you know that are not
shown here email them to me.

When I was a boy there were no computer games at all....not even
one....but by the time I left university I could just about play pacman and space invaders If you want to live
like a medical student (in 1977) then try out these games by clicking the link
below. You will need a fast computer and a java plug-in for them to work properly.
miniclip

A man walked into the doctors surgery with a cucumber up his nose, a carrot
in his right ear and a banana in his left ear....What's the matter with me asks the man.....
....... the doctor replies - you're not eating properly.
Eating good food and taking exercise is best started young.
I know parents bore the pants off kids about eating the right type of food but
it make sense that if you start off
fat and lardy then it is not surprising that you end up that way when you are
older.
I bet you didn't know that of grownups, 63% of
men and 53% of women are overweight... and things are only getting worse.
I don't mean you never eat at
MacDonald's or Burger King but give your stomach
a break every so often and feed it some fruit and veg. It is better to eat some
fruit, dried fruit of nuts instead of crisps all the while. You know it makes sense.
Have a look at the sort of food you should be eating:

Reproduced with kind permission of the Food
Standards Agency.'
People who know about these things say you have to eat about 5
portions of fruit and veg a day. Eat more bread and cereal and lay off the fats
and sugar. And not too much meat. Being a vegetarian is not a bad thing but you
need to be careful about getting enough protein and iron.
If you want to know more about healthy eating go the food standards agency web site. There is plenty of information for kids and teenagers...
www.foodstandards.gov.uk/

On the subject of fatties -does
your father's (or, on the other hand, your mother) bits of body wobble about
when he moves. Then he may be one of those 63% that I mentioned before. Bung him
on the scales and plot how fat he is by plotting him on the graph below - and
example of what to do is shown by the blue dotted line. After he stops crying
when you tell him the bad news give him the web address above which will tell
him how to look and feel a lot better

Reproduced with kind permission of the Food
Standards Agency.

If you have any really hard medical questions
you can try me out meanwhile I will tell you why I decided to become a
doctor.... to treat deadly diseases of course!
In this country most people die of cancer
(don't even talk to me about lung cancer and smoking - yuk!) or strokes or heart
disease but there are plenty of exotic diseases that you can catch if you go to
hot countries. Some of these can be prevented by having holiday jabs and in the
case of malaria - by taking tablets and covering up....
If you want to know a bit about malaria then
click here
HELP!--HELP!--HELP!--HELP!--HELP!--HELP!--HELP!
Just because you are a kid does
not mean that you can't ask for help without telling your parents or thinking
that health care people like doctors and nurses will be telling your parents
about anything you might say. If you are worried about something then telephone
or call in at the surgery or email us. You can also have a confidential chat
with the school nurse. A couple of useful links are shown below if you need to
use them.
Bullying online
Life can be a misery when you're
being bullied at school and if you feel you don't have any friends. Here's help
and advice if you're having a hard time. There's also information on how to stay
safe.
Childline
ChildLine is the free, 24-hour helpline for
children and young people in the UK. Children and young people can call our
helpline on 0800 1111 about any problem such as if some one at home or
school is giving you a hard time. The line is open 24 hours a day.
Children who are deaf or find using a regular phone difficult can try our textphone service on 0800 400 222. ChildLine's counsellors are there to help you
find ways to sort things out.
If you know somebody who has lost
his/her parents Winston's wish is a good website for help and advice.
Symi's story:
"The worst fight I remember between my mum and my step-dad happened one
Saturday when I came back from playing football in the park. I don’t know
why they were fighting, but it looked bad. I could hear him cursing, things
breaking and my mum crying. My heart was pounding. I was angry and ashamed
that the neighbours could hear everything. My step-dad had probably just
come home from the pub with his mates. The fighting was always worse when he
drank..."
Domestic violence? its not your
fault - you're not alone.
Click here